from p.4 on Mon., 12/11

The feels.

I wish I could:
explain your eyes & how
the sound of your voice
gives me butterflies.

How your smile makes
my heart skip a beat.

& how every tie I'm
with you, I feel so
complete.


-----


The bitter cold
greets me
when I step out.

My body starts to shake
as the cold
surrounds me.


-----


Last of now
until then.

Put it back on the
shelf and wait.

Wait for passion
to grow, feelings
to change, and
the skies to
darken.

Until next time
my friend. Carpe Diem .


-----


Light flashing everywhere,
music filling the space,
people singing
and dancing.

Church during Christmas time
is like a night club.

from p.1 on Mon., 12/11

The melting pot:
flavors of meat
blend into the
rich sauce,
savory.


-----


Like a wave that
never makes it to the
shore,

Washed over joy floods
the grainy and.

The salt rinses my
eyes with hope.

Almost There.


-----


Veins of electricity
trickle across the ground.
From 20,000 feet above ,
problems minimize
the memory of your eyes.

Your hands
begin to mystify
like the clouds
from 20,000 feet above.


-----


We all hold each
other's hands.

We close our eyes,

We wait, and wait, and
wait.

We don't hear "Arapahoe
High School."

Disappointed, we let go of each
other's hands.


-----

from p.4 on Mon., 12/4

The dry air
cracked away my fingers.

The crisp wind
like shards of glass
hitting my face.

Colorado,
without a drop of snow.

Moisture gone from the air....


-----


Paint fills my nose
and makes me cough.

How can something
so pretty become
deadly?

But aren't most things
in this wold like
that?


-----


Noises around us
loud laughter & chatter,
but all I hear is
your voice.

All I see is
your smile.

All I want is
this moment
to escape this memory.


-----


Walking into Marriot
Hotels looking like
we're from the 1920s
but the people we
sing for are. I
guess I'm living like
a Rockstar.

from p.1 on Mon., 12/4

Foam settling
over strong
espresso.

The warmth
mixed with
the warmth of Christmas
lights ignited:

My dread of
Monday's reality.


-----


Bright lights reflected
in my eyes.
As the people walk by
music surrounds us,
laughter from small
children,
my head on his shoulder
and we smile.


-----


Everything was
spinning.

So hungry.

I said, "never again" as
I ate an Oreo.


-----


My eyes burn.
dead leaves
drift through
strong winds.

Hollow life.

from p.4 on Mon., 11/27

You told me
"I'll be here forever."

Understanding you is
crazy.

So I wrote this
song.


-----


Why do I feel like I'm always running,
always chasing after someone
or something?

Why do I feel like I'm never breathing,
wondering,
wandering,

giving all I have for one
specific thing?


-----


It's happy at first,
but bittersweet
if you think
too hard.


------


And as for me,
I am simply a necessary filler--
merely part of the background
painting to make up the lives of others.

And as for me,
the question lies:
am I truly living, or
am I nothing more
than just alive,
breathing without
much of a meaning?

from p.1 on Mon., 11/27

Somewhere
over the rainbow,

Lay hills of
salt and poison.

A time in the
night,
shines my rainbow.


-----


I stopped saying
"I love you"
because I thought it
was losing meaning.

But really,

I am just
losing
feeling.


-----


Nearer I become
to the icy solitude.
It breaking beneath
me,
as I glide
across my own,
brand new,
paved path.


------


Wind blowing back my
hair
as I skate away.

Rushing water on my
right.

Him on my left,

And I can breathe again.

from p.1 on Mon., 11/13

Breath.
Tension.
Pull.
Explosion.
Waves.
Nothing.


-----


I lit your cigarette,
the smoke blew soft
on my face
and
I fell into
Wonderland as I took your tobacco
kiss addicted to you.


-----


Take me back
to owhere time
stands still,
when the music
was loud and
the children
went outside,
to the aesthetics of my home,
painted the sky.


-----


Little noses flattened
against a window,
curious eyes glued on
tiny airplanes rising
from the ground--bringing
up their excitement with
it.

from p.4 on Mon., 11/13

let me fold myself
inside
out,

and show you my blue
veins,

like future tears flowing
through my broken body,

and my bleeding heart,
barely beating hart,
that is MY light dying
out.


-----


Stacy wept on the
ground, pounding her fist
into the ruined grass, defeated.

I looked on, blissfully
removed.


-----


I wnt her to know
that this moment will not remain this moment.

The boy
whom seh thinks she loves
is just a dent in the surface
of her hart.

Dents reshape.

The world
that she knows to be cruel
is actually her shelter
from the greater unknown.


-----


We were falling away.
You left me with a bittersweet
taste.

But when I send my heart your way,
it bounces off the walls you
made.

Ricochet.

from p.4 on Mon., 11/6

I woke up.
I went downstairs.

My boyfriend
said we need to break
up.

So I started to cry.
He walked out of the door.
But then,

I woke up,
I went downstairs.
It was all a dream,

but it was true!


-----


I see her with
everything together.

I just want my days
to have a purpose.

But it's easier to watch
the world
go by.


-----


Our futures and dreams:
they're fleeting, retreating,
it's okay.

I promise

I don't know what to say,
but I'm going to want you 'till
the stars evaporate.

We're only here for just a moment,
until next we're in the night.


-----


Your eyes have
become the color of
the sky I wake up to
day after wretched day.

from p.1 on Mon., 11/6

intertwined in a hug,
one's true love,
we will find a
way

through the prickly
bushes of their
words.


-----


Nostalgic music,
smell, movies,
shower me in memory.

Christmas on its
way.

Happier than I've been,
I pray it lasts for the snow
could coat my past.


-----


The chill of the sun
and the heat of the
game.

A cold heart,
and a cold heart,
wild.

Where did it all go?


-----


Drives on South Broadway.
Trash cars.
Thrift stores.

We could drive for
hours,
looking at old memories,
as time passes by.

Listening to his
favorite tunes.

from p.4 on Mon., 10/30

I waited for hours upon hours,

he promised he'd come.

Once again he abanodned me.

You promised you
changed,
but
you
wont.


-----


Through familiar halls
I strode,
the haunts of days
past calling to me,

but follow them,
I shall not!

For I must escape
this place, with or
without you.


-----


The frigid
wind freezes
me, for a few moments in
fright so I can't
feel my frozen
fingers
flexing.


-----


Chicken on chicken
on chicken on
chicken...

I want to go home...

why do I work here?

from p.1 on Mon., 10/30

I bite into the
sweetness of a
summer carrot.

Tears streaming
down face.

I remember how
instead of the
summer hugs, I
got the winter goodbyes.


-----


Arms wrapped in eachother.

You are the cement
holding me together.

The sun erupting
in the East
could not burn brighter
than us.


-----


Shrimp and
sparkling juice.

from Mon., 10/23

This morning I woke up to darkness.

It reminded me

of you.

Take me in

please.

For, I want to be dark

too.

-----

Her eyes tempt me

just as much as

her hands do.

They keep her secrets

hidden from the world

and from me.

Her hands move across my body,

but her eyes move

across my soul.

-----

Artist released drops

of liquid paint, the

brightest red,

the deepest orange

all across the

canvas come

daybreak.

-----

Mind aching with

the worry of

tomorrow, the regret

of yesterday and

the body numbing 

anticipation

of now...

...oh and there's

also homework

:)

from p.4 on Mon., 10/16

Sleep
Breakfast
Bathroom
Laptop
Lunch
Laptop
Dinner
Bathroom
Sleep
Repeat.


-----


How can I
possibly write
down something
about this
weekend when
he wasn't
there?


-----


I want to do
what will make
me happy.

And I'm sorry but you're
toxic to my
aspirations, so I
will just watch
myself burn.

I will burn until
I can't breathe,
until my thoughts
are the only
force I care about

or...

today I will
take a hammer
to the mirror
because I do so much,
and you can't stop me anymore.


-----


Burning embers
of falling leaves
extinguished by
the bite of the
crisp fall breeze.

from p.1 on Mon., 10/16

Climb trees,
go out on a limb
to find me.

Forget about them,
what are those
songs that you sing.

In your head?

Echoing.


-----


Waking  up to
a quiet and
empty house,

already waiting
on the water
to boil and give life,

so I stood

pouring a cup
of coffee and

stared at
university pamphlets.


-----


I am as happy
as a chocolate
bar on a rainy day
:) <3
(my boyfriend is a meany pants)


-----


Precipitation
dripping,

I'm a cold glass
of water in the
sun,

moist,

and you're thirsty.

Drink me Alice.


-----


Snow:
Sleepy blanket of comfort.
Naty winds pinching skin.
Own mistakes, love each day.
With the love he brings my way.

from p.4 on Mon., Oct. 9th

It's never a good Monday
when you wake to cold.

It's never a good Monday,
when it snows.

It's never a good Monday
when the sun never shows.

It's never a good Monday.


-----


"Hey lil' mamma
lemme whisper in
your ear,"

(my girl then says),
"Boy please."

(I then ate
the rest of the
Ruffles and cried myself
to sleep.)


-----


My boundaries have
nothing to do with you
and that means I'm
not scared of you
breaking them.


-----


My cage was broken,
by the sun and stars.

Freeing me to soar
in euphoria among my
avian brothers.

Through ink black skies
I flew,
As the snows dampened
my wings and flooded
my nest.


-----


I'm grateful
for the memory of her
every damn 8th
of the month.

It's when you go
down to the big grey
stone
and share
what she can't be here
for.


-----


Falling into the
     blackness
           sweet relaxation
               one sound shatters
                    it

"Amen"

Falling asleep in church doesn't always work out.

from p.1 on Mon., 10/9

Grabbed my

face and

kissed me.

But what

now?

Say it again.

-----

Two strangers,

intertwined,

slowly shuffling to the beat.

Surrounded by others,

all I see is us.

Flint on steel,

a spark is lit.

-----

Sining out 

smiles

flashing lights

hearts beating

bodies dancing.

"I love you"

rolls off his lips for the first time.

"I love you too"

roll off mine.

-----

Late Saturday night

just the mop
and I

dancing around

red tiled floors.

sleep crawling

up my spine

begging to go

to bed.

-----

Light peeks over hills,

air warms from brisk to

cool. Yellow trees spot

green land, while clear

blue mountains stand 

tall. "The morning is

beautiful" whispers a 

little flower.

from p.4 on Mon., 10/2

Couldn't stop laughing,
heart full of love.

I began to melt
into the frost covered earth.

Finally, I felt
at one with the world.


-----


Are bright
rainbow fish
really beautiful?

Because they're still fish.

I am a fish,
colorful but I'm
a damn fish.


-----


The yellow ripple of
golden aspen leaves
trickle down the mountains
between deep green
spruces and junipers.

A gray blanket of clouds
fills the sky. The cow says "hello"
as we drive by.


-----


Eyes.

Looking into each others'.

Hearts.

Racing as fast as a freight train.

Butterflies.

Escaping the void as our lips,
press together.


-----


Frustration
and anger.

But not unexpected.

A salty cracker in the rain.

from p.1 on 10/2

Something so pure

about being still

in the middle of


absolutely nowhere.


-----


I saw you,
and like autumn colors,
I
     fell
           for
               you.


-----


The Edge:

There is no honest
way to expalin it
because the only
people who really
know where it is
are the ones
who have gone over.

from p.4 on Mon., 9/25

Run,
Stop,
Cry,
Move on


-----


I am nothing of a man.
A shell of silence,
and of love.

How am I to be a man,
if all I can think of,
is her?


-----


Gray floods my room.
Glazing past the glazed
glass,

my mind wanders
as nature's music
fills my ears.


-----


As I drove by
I remembered
the rose bushes
chocolate cupcakes
a cave of blankets
a ladybug pillow
that I didn't care for.

I thought I had forgotten.

from p.1 on Mon., 9/25

Fall--
Gray skies,
gentle rain,
sweaters & spice tea,
cozy homes
with blankets & books,
Fall--
it's finally here.


-----


Six Rainbows,
and a sea
of blocks.

Horses all around,
free,
but suddenly

GONE.


-----


Eyes meet eyes,
my heart starts to flutter
as I wonder

"Does he notice me?"


-----


My calloused fingers
picket at the strings
smelling like
a rainy swing-set.

I wiped my tears
and played on.

from p.4 on Mon., 9/18

Complete
Pure
Vulnerable
Worship.

My heart was


-----


I finally had my
first kiss!

But then
i woke up and realized
it was just a dream.

I didn't let out just
a tear, but a stream.


-----


Breathe desperately,
     So our sleeping limbs may awake
          We may not become ghosts yet,
               but these awful things make me ache for answers.


-----


We lived in the present,
with the gift of the unknown.

We live in the present,
with the gift of past mistakes.

We will live in the future,
with the gift of present knowledge.


-----


Walkin' around
lookin' down
by the play ground
look,
there's a clown!

from p.1 on Mon., 9/18

As heavy clouds
swirled above,

below was old
movies and
endless cups of
orange tea. Not
a minute spent
away from the

oh so loving
couch.


-----


Early morning.
Watery dew on the grass.

The room was cold,
my friends moved
across the floor.

I watched wishing
I was out there.


-----


A screaming sensation
in the front of
my head.

3 circles of hope
to ease the voices
until my head

hits the pillow
and darkness quiets
the symphony.


-----


The screen stares
back at me--

--I just sent out
my soul!

He now knows
and there's no
response,

but as long as he knows,
I stay content.

from p.4 on Mon., 9/11

I didn't write
a poem.

But

if I did

it would be
ill.


------


People keep telling me
how they french kiss girls,
while I just sit
and talk
with the squirrels.


-----


I was a porcelain doll,
unappreciated,
collecting dust,
only an inch away from falling
and shattering.

But I sit on the top shelf.

I can see everything,
but do they know
I'm here?


-----


Utter madness:

being stretched into a thin line,
trying to balance between
work,
school,
family,
friends.

from p.1 on Mon., Sept. 11th

The music flooded
though my veins
as flashes of
neon absorbed
my vision.

Sounds of years ago
filled my heart
with content that
the night was all it
should be.


-----


Teenage love
you know it will break.

But for now we
are spiraling roses
blooming,
expanding,

yet fragile to the touch.


-----


family friend
spawns into a
new level of
life.
Leaving behind
a sorrowful
lost family
back on level
1.


-----


We only had a little
time, a little joy,
a little love, but it
was so needed and
in a way it made
my day.

from p.4 on Wed., 9/6

Getting together,
bonding & growing.

Feeling light as a feather
as the night is slowing.


-----


They told me to look at the sun.

As I watched
the orange dot illuminate
the sky,

I thought

of him

and smiled.

His dimpled smile,
his curly locks, are so much
better than a damn sun.


-----


We wake up early,
feel the mountain air
on our faces.
But,
really,
no other feeling compares to

just being with you.


-----


Mountains and hills,
quiet and calm,
continuous and never ending.

from p.1 on Wed., 9/6

The dehydrated,
tired camel wearily
shuffles up the
rocky mountain.

At the top--he
sits, and stares,
and sneezes.


-----


Looking eye to eye,
smiling,
our cheeks filled with blush,
stomachs filled with butterflies.

She looked so beautiful,
laughing, enjoying life.


-----


Running around,
restrained,
blind.

My heart knows
who I should be loving
but my lover
I can't find.


-----


The fire blazes,
washing out the cold,
as our group huddles
around the
campfire.

after-prom weekend images from p.4 on 5/8

The only lights
I was awake for
were the flashing
neon ones.


-----


Eggrolls a-plenty,
expired candy, empty
dipping in sauce,
who's boss?


-----


Don't let go...
Just hold on
tight. This feeling
won't last forever

Just tonight.


-----


Loud bright colors
fill the sky.

We have made it.

We have survived.


-----


Dirt and sun and
baking bones.

after-prom weekend images from p.1 on 5/8

If your words
could speak,
your lies would
run red.

Unable to be
honest bout the
simplest things.


-----


Sneaking around,

although we know
exactly what is
coming for us...


-----


Driving nails
through fingertips,

Painted
to match the evening.


-----


Sunlight blinding
my eyes
and warmth against
my skin.


-----


Butterflies in my stomach.

They never quiet
when I see her.

from p.4 on Mon., May 1st

Fingers flutter,
notes unfurl,
flashes of passion flow through the air

then silence.


-----


Heavy white pollows
sleep upon green beds
crackling.


-----


I'm in the parking
lot of life taking
up 4 spaces.

from p.1 on Mon., May 1st

Waiting for the sun 

to come and surround

me as I sleep the

days away.

-----

Stillness.

The quiet

calls so 

loudly.

-----

Nigh time blur,

envy fillst he room.

from Monday April 24th

Midnight memories:

collecting dust:


-----


An adventure of new
with friends of old
exploring a world
that was concerningly cold.


-----


Filling up empty
leaving
a house
with only memories.

House regenerating
memories that once
kept it full.


-----


Shadows chased
to every dead end.

Leaving the dreams
left on hold.


-----


The air is different at 1:27
in the morning.

10-word short stories from Mon., 4/17

He trips over his left foot onto her lap.


-----


You kill me when you keep your phone on silent.


-----


Home alone, falling asleep. Until you hear the door creak.


-----


Taking off all the makeup, I revealed my true self.


-----


Johnny get the net! I see some ripples over there.


-----


Bright colors. Flowers surround each step for a loved one.


-----


She never learned to fly, so she decided to stay.


-----


Relaxation is warm, like the cheese pizza I'm not making.

from Mon., 4/10

I step out into the pungent scent of hidden flowers. I can pictuer them, springing purple, bursting from the earth and hanging like grapes. Light pink, shedding from trees. Why would I want to sleep when I know I can't dream up anything better than this?


-----


Tug.

Feel the flick
and the pull.

Excitement..


-----


I fall into my bed,

the ocean,

sheets and blankets,
drown me in comfort,
my consciousness,
lost and found.

from p.4 on 4/3

Tick tock,
time slowly
speeds away.

Hope hip bop,
you cooked your dinner
to the skippidychop.


-----


The curl of a smile,
the flex of a finger--
art is living!


-----


Stars crawl across
the night sky at
a snail's pace, yet
not slow enough.


-----


Only ones who know rain falls,
drive slow.

Summer dream
long night, low.

I'll see you soon
but, please, don't go.

from p.1 on 4/3

The skin
soaked up neon,
the beautiful light
glazed my hands,

rippling on the
surface,

from those
smooth,
funky,
beats.


-----


having no plans
and awake to birds
chirping, I go back

to sleep in comfort
and peace.


-----


Empty.
Silence.
Sadness.

A car rushes by,

Faint breathing.

Muffled crying.

Empty.


-----


The things I cannot say:
I'd still be yours,

if you asked.

from p.4 on Mon., 3/20

Of I were awake
to see the message,

what wouldn't happened
could've
and should've.


-----


Fresh hamburgers,
juicy watermelon,
a barking dog,
mini-golf
and a warm sunset.


-----


Filtered light falls from cloudy
white windows,

Bitter scented soil mingles
with plant's transpiration.

Greenhouse going for miles,
urban forest here!


-----


Rose petals
bleeding on
my sheets.

from p.1 on Mon., 3/20

Nothing.

Barren and windy,
a feeling of grey
overcasted onto me.


-----


Nothing.

And nothing.

Then...

Something.


-----


I glanced over my shoulder
and my heart hasn't
stopped skipping beats.

I found her doing the
same.

Holding my gaze.

Holy S***


-----


Now the sky shines
with beauty
and the
world smells
with fresh
air making
me think
of a new
beginning.

from p.4 on Mon., 3/13

Frightened.

Chris Walker,
walks and screams.

Outlasting the game.

Outlasting the asylum.

On another note,
Ikea.


-----


As the days go by
the sunshine slowly
fades.

As the world darkens,
all I see is light.


-----


As life moves quick,
I am standing still:

Enjoying the loud cars
and people's chatter,
petting a soft husky
and holding his hand tight.

A moment I won't forget.


-----


The walk,
extra steezy
made it appear
more breezy.

from p.1 on Mon., 3/13

Deep noises
overtaking reality,

falling deeper

into

the normal.


-----


The streets were wet,
the walls were bright.
I wanted to climb
inside them and
forget the world.


-----


Innocent
green eyes

take away
my focus.


-----


Tears,

I don't know what
happened,

resentment turned
regret,

she was the
only good thing in
my life,

and I ruined it.

from p.4 on Mon., Feb. 27th

papers,
words:

lots of meaningless
words.


-----


Scrambled eggs and
cleaning supplies.


-----


Born cracked &
shattered.

Now abandoned.

Replaced by one alike,
but new.

Iridescent and new beauty.


-----


As if warmed by summer sun
arms bear fresh laundry,
static dryer waves radiating
pillow clouded mornings.


-----


Skip dap
pap shabap
slip slap
dodap dodap.

from p.1 on Mon., Feb. 27th

I marched on
towards
unenviable distinction.

It wouldn't be the
first time she
friendzoned me.


-----


A girl with
cinders upon
her face.

I felt like her
that day.


-----


Many filled with joy.
Some are winners.
All have regret.


-----


I forgot to close my
curtains and fell asleep
to the moon

but wake up to the
sun burning my
back.


-----


An impromptu adventure,
long walks through dirt,
exists in my mind

perfectly.

There's still mud on
my shoes.


-----

from p.4 on Mon., Feb. 16th

Deep in the depths of the
bitter black ocean

turned pure by abused animals,

it was delicious.


-----


I love looking at the
sunset and the sunrise,

but I would miss a
thousand sunsets just to
look into your eyes.


-----


Like a God,
above all others.

Until,

the mistake of apparel drives
cheek to dirt
and heels to head.

from period 1 on Mon., Feb. 13th

Please don't ask me
to be your Valentine.

I don't find it charming
when you say "be mine."

Roses are red,
cliche and unoriginal too,
so I beg of you
this Valentine's Day,
try something new.


-----


I thought

(of all the things I was
thinking, here is the
absence. It's a
pretty long silence)

but no.



-----


While adjusting
variables and strings
for an assignment.

An avian pal
passes on--
buds since
middle school.

No  one remains....


-----


One year
older,
the youngest
you'll ever
be.

from periods 1 and 4 on Feb. 6th

Flour outlined

the surface

of my hands

as they launch

a flying saucer

of dough into 

oblivion.

-----

Crowded streets

humming with

running motors

shrouded in the 

shadows of 

skyscrapers.

Tears after a 

phone ringing

best night of my life.

-----

Sunshine 

and nothing.

-----

Blended, smeared,

and rushed are

the colors along

the path of the

derailed.

from p.4 on Mon., Jan. 30th

I'm nowhere.

Words lost on
pages, tears scattered
everywhere as my
thoughts run
rapid,
caressing
the binding
of a
now
finished
story.



-----



Becoming one with
the clouds &
sliding with style.



-----



The sound the
alarm clock makes

...

(as in silence)

because there is
no need to set it.



-----



Sunlight drifts through
vertical rivers of cotton.

Swaddled in down and
polyester, drifting
between harsh reality
and the warm cushion
of unconsiousness.

from p.1 on Mon., Jan. 30th

On the creaky
old board I flew
down the driveway
hitting,
feeling every crack
being hit!

and stopped by the
gravel at the end.



-----



She had beautiful
green eyes, the type that
remind you of the wild.

Her eyes a mossy
forest, I could get
lost in them forever.



-----



The happiness
of ice turning
into
water.



-----



The loud sound of
water on sand, sitting
back with a cup in your
hand. White foam filling
the top of the water

as they crash down.